There is a saying in Chinese that you only have two hands and if you use them to throw two knives, that will be no match for the hundreds of knives coming your way. The bottom line is don’t push others aside to be a winner. Don’t use both your hands to throw knives, instead take one—or both—of those hands and use it to hold the hand of another or to help a fallen comrade. Life is not a zero-sum game, no winner takes all.
There is a psychological impact of pushing others away to “win.” We think everyone is the enemy and everyone, in turn, looks at us as an enemy. It is a lonely existence. It isolates us and makes us bitter about life and the people that surround us. We can be successful without pushing others away, and we can enjoy that success with the people around us. We don’t have to enjoy it alone.
In fact, some of the most successful people have gotten to where they are today because of the teams they have been part of, the family who have supported them and cheered them on, and the colleagues who have shared knowledge, ideas, and wisdom.
Your ‘personal pit crew’
CEO advisor and author Mindy Mackenzie says everyone needs a “personal pit crew.” She cites that while many people think they can get to the top all on their own, almost everyone has a few “trusted advisors.” Not only can bouncing ideas off a friend help you to gain insight into what you might be missing, or what route you should be taking, but pushing others aside is going to hurt relationships.
An article by Huffington Post blogger Anat Shenker-Osorio says it well: “Humans are a social species. We are pack animals; we like to be together lots of the time. Some of our greatest joys and oldest cultural practices involve sharing: our homes with a stranger, bread and wine with friends, material goods with our families.”
The real winners in this game of life are the people who recognize they can’t do everything on their own. We need people in our court to lift us up, cheer us on, and be there when we fail. Because even the most successful people have failed at some point, just look at example three in our post on trusting yourself (LINK TO: https://womenstherapyinstitute.com/how-to-trust-in-yourself/)