Tag Archives: Career

work identity

Why Being Yourself At Work Can Help You Get Ahead

It has long been thought that to succeed professionally, you need to blend into the culture of your workplace, you need to mute your differences and not “shake the pot,” especially as a woman or member of a minority group. But a recent article in the Harvard Business Review has revealed that there can also be many benefits to sharing your cultural differences and being your whole, unique self. 

When we don’t hold back or hide our true identities, we can offer a unique perspective. As a minority or a member of a different gender group than others in similar roles, often you have different life experiences that provide a different view on a particular subject area. For example, a woman is going to know a lot more about designing a training bra than a man. Someone who grew up in a poor family is going to understand public aid better than someone who never needed it. Someone who struggled to fit in as a child because of racial differences is going to understand minority issues better than someone who didn’t face those circumstances. 

Unique Perspective

Your unique perspective can also help to identify any racially insensitive marketing or features that might have been overlooked. By being open with your thoughts and observations you can help to prevent serious issues from taking place. If you are willing to share details about your life or culture with others, you also have the potential to help bridge differences and create a more conducive work environment. People are naive to differences and often rely on incorrect stereotypes to classify those around them, you have the potential to open their minds and change that perspective by sharing a bit about you. 

Being true to yourself and sharing your identity with others can help to build rapport among colleagues or clients. When similarities are discovered in people of different nationalities you have created a bridge from one culture to another. As humans, we tend to connect over a common interest or life experience, like being a mom, enjoying a particular hobby, or experiencing a similar life event. 

Benefits vs. Risks

As with all benefits, there are also risks. When you stand out or relate to a specific cultural or gender group you might find yourself getting stuck with the same projects over and over again. You may also be faced with resistance from management or colleagues who don’t agree with your degree of difference. They might be uncomfortable with you getting noticed or pointing out a different path they had yet to consider. 

In the end, it is your self-confidence, creativity, and work ethic that are going to get you noticed. Being yourself and having the ability to feel like you can truly be you are going to contribute to your overall happiness and self-confidence and likely your success.

Peter Pan

Do You Have Peter Pan Syndrome?

Do you remember Peter Pan? You know the boy who doesn’t grow up. I mean, who doesn’t want to stay a child forever? Life was easy as a child, less responsibility, more fun and way fewer worries to consume our days with.

But, as an adult there comes a time when you have to grow up. At some point, you need to take on adult responsibilities and shift your priorities. Unfortunately, we are not surrounded in the magic that can keep us children forever. Growing up and shifting priorities is not a smooth transition for everyone. Some adults truly struggle with this change, which is why the term “Peter Pan Syndrome” was coined by psychologists.

What are some of the characteristics of Peter Pan Syndrome?

1.) Unwillingness to work hard when you aren’t motivated. We all know how hard it can be to get things done when you don’t feel like doing something, but unfortunately being an adult sometimes means doing things you don’t want to do.

2.) Dabbling in many different things. Rather than focusing your time on honing one skill, a person who has Peter Pan Syndrome might spend their time trying a bunch of different things because they can’t pinpoint the one skill they want to master.

3.) Aversion to networking. Meeting successful people in your career field of choice can be hard, yet necessary to find a job and/or move up in a position. You have to put yourself out there, talk and learn from others.

4.) Focusing on the long shot. We are all told to dream big, but at some point, you might need to shift gears from trying to make it big as a musician or a film star and instead focus on a more realistic area of interest. Maybe instead of trying to be a multi-billionaire rockstar, you become a music teacher. Or instead of focusing all your energy into being a successful actor, teach a theatre class.

5.) Abusing alcohol and drugs. These types of behaviors while often linked to addiction or other mental health conditions, can make finding and keeping a successful job difficult. It can make adulting that much harder to do.

6.) Blaming your failure on an external source. Often those having difficulty growing up don’t want to accept that they aren’t successful in their careers because they aren’t motivated to try, and instead want to blame it on something their parents, spouse, or former employer did/said. The truth of the matter is some people have come from war, hunger, poverty, abuse, etc. and have come out successful. It is all about finding that motivation to go after the life you want.

If you identify with one or more of these characteristics it might be helpful to talk to a licensed mental health professional, life coach, or career counselor who can help to guide you on the path for success. The first thing you have to do is realize that to be successful in a career you will need to grow up, as hard as that is, and if you are struggling with that reality there are tools to help you. Anyone can succeed in life and career, it will just take some willingness to make changes.

Why are more women being diagnosed with ADHD?

Over the years I have seen an increase in women coming to me with symptoms of Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder or ADHD. Many of them are concerned they may have ADHD and are looking for a solution. It got me thinking. Why are we seeing such an increase? What has changed to cause more women to experience symptoms of ADHD? 

Our reality as women has changed. We are busier than ever before while still facing the pressures of traditional gender roles. We are still expected to take care of our homes and meals. Many women now have taken on professional careers outside of the home environment adding to the mounting pressure. We are worried more than ever—about everything. Not to mention we are constantly in a state of comparing ourselves to others with the rise of social media and smart devices. Those women who choose to stay home struggle with feeling stir crazy and unfulfilled. We are easily distracted. 

All of the stress modern-day women are struggling with is causing them to lose sleep. They are staying up to later hours trying to get everything done. They are feeling the pressure to be the Pinterest mom or the perfect housewife/cook but also the career woman. Research shows that lack of sleep could be exactly what is contributing to symptoms of ADHD. 

The disruption of day and night rhythms, staying up later, eating at different times, variations in body temperature and physical movement, all of it can contribute to inattentiveness and challenging behavior, according to research done at the Vrije Universitiet Medical Centre in Amsterdam. This research also showed that people with ADHD had a rise in the hormone melatonin an hour-and-a-half later in the day than those who did not, contributing to that lack of sleep. All of this pointing to the reality that ADHD might actually be a sleep disorder. 

Similar studies have also found that those with ADHD had higher rates of daytime sleepiness than those without, making it harder to focus. Other symptoms such as restless legs syndrome and periodic leg movement are also common in those suffering from ADHD, according to the National Sleep Foundation. 

The bottom line is we are overwhelmed, overworked, and exhausted. We aren’t sleeping as much and therefore we are finding it difficult to focus. If you are someone who is struggling with symptoms of ADHD, it may be helpful to seek out a licensed professional who is trained in helping adults.

Sources:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/wp/2017/09/22/could-adhd-be-a-type-of-sleep-disorder-that-would-fundamentally-change-how-we-treat-it/?noredirect=on&utm_term=.40c10b6da7af

https://www.sleepfoundation.org/sleep-disorders-problems/adhd-and-sleep